i'm stressed about school
i think i'm gonna drop two of my three classes. have to talk to my parents first. i'm fuckin up big time here folks.
on to things that make me smile....
What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery
One is made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play
with....the other is used to carry groceries.
Three old ladies are sitting on a park bench. Suddenly a
man comes along, flings open his trench coat and flashes them.
Two have a stroke... but the third doesn't 'cause her arms
aren't long enough.
How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?
It's not hard
this one's the best...
After the Great Britain Beer Festival, in London, all the brewery
presidents decided to go out for a beer. The guy from Corona sits down and
says, "Hey Senor, I would like the world's best beer, a Corona." The
bartender dusts off a bottle from the shelf and gives it to him. The guy
from Budweiser says, "I'd like the best beer in the world, give me
'The King Of Beers', a Budweiser." The bartender gives him one. The guy from
Coors says, "I'd like the only beer made with Rocky Mountain spring water,
give me a Coors." He gets it. The guy from Guinness sits down and says,
"Give me a Coke." The bartender is a little taken aback, but gives him what
he ordered. The other brewery presidents look over at him and ask "Why
drinking a Guinness?" and the Guinness president replies, "Well, I figured
if you guys aren't drinking beer, neither would I."